BTW: Ini adalah sebuah cerita, work of fiction gitu de.
“Hey Jessica! Someone’s here to pick you up!”
“Pick me up? Where? And who is it, mom?”
“I thought yesterday you told me you’re going out today? And
it’s a guy!”
I abruptly sit up from my slouching position and look at the
time.
11 AM.
“Shoot I’m late!” I scream as I run to the front door.
I cruise past my mom, who is ready to interrogate me about
the guy who pick me up in a red Mazda 2, and run out of the house. Still in my
house clothes, I scream, “Archie!!!!! Wait for 10 minutes!!!!!!”
I run back upstairs, take a bath, pick up random clothes to
wear, take all my belongings, throw them all inside my handbag, and run back
downstairs. My mom is still looking at me suspiciously, so I kiss her on the
cheek. “See you later mom!” I say loudly as I run to the front door.
Archie is still waiting in front of his car. He grins widely
when he sees me. “Wow. You could be late too?”
“Shut up,” I say sternly as I hit his arm. I get into the
car from the passenger seat, which takes a long enough time to hear him
chuckle.
I could see Archie bowing and saying goodbye to my mom
before he enters the car. I snicker. “Trying to make a good impression in front
of my mom? That’s smart of you.”
He shakes his head. “That is called manners, Jessica. Unlike
some people I know, I like to be polite and well-mannered, thank you,” he says
solemnly.
I scoff and he laughs at my response. He then increases the
volume of the radio and dances to the song Blurred Lines.
I rest my head on the seat and let out a deep breath. I
could finally release the breath that I’m holding in from the hectic morning. I
totally forgot about the promise I made to Archie yesterday on the phone, even
when I have informed my mom about it.
I left the house in such hurry I’m positive this will be a
story for my mom. Not to mention the hassle my mom is going to make in front of
my family. She would definitely tease me in front of my dad and siblings. She
would proclaim to the world that a guy just pick me up for ‘a date’. Just
great.
I glance sideway to Archie who is still busy singing. I sigh.
What are we doing together anyway? Are we on a date? On a friendly-date? On a
more-than-friend-date? Or are we just spending time together as friends? More
than friends?
I try to remember what he told me yesterday through text
message.
“Hey, how about going
out with me on a date tomorrow?” No.
“Hey, let’s go to the
mall together tomorrow!” That sounds more like it. Wait, no, I don’t think
that’s what he said.
“Do you want to help
me tomorrow? I’m bored, so I want to go out and eat pancakes. Help me out?” Yeah,
that’s what he said. He then told me that he’ll pick me up at home and that I
should be ready at 11.
Well, it’s great that he picked me up at 11 sharp. And it’s
also great that I am able to get out of the house and have some fun at summer
holiday. The school is on break, and there’s pretty much nothing else for me to
do at home.
But, is it great if this is not the only time he did this?
This is the third time we go out together during summer break. And for it to
only be the two of us is new.
I haven’t even counted the time we went out together with
several of our friends. If I count them together, then this would be the
seventh time we go out together during summer break. And summer break is only
starting!
“Why are you sighing?” He suddenly asks with concern.
I didn’t even know he was paying attention to me. I shrug. I
couldn’t possibly tell him what I was thinking. “Nothing. Anyway, this trip is
your treat, right?”
He grunts. “What? Who told you that?”
I put on the sweetest smile I have on my face and look at
him with puppy eyes. “Pleaseeeeeeee,” I plead.
He looks at me for a while, baffled, and sighs. “Alright
then. How could I say no to Jessica? I’ll go take the moon if you want me to,”
he says casually.
My cheeks heat up when he says that. I turn my head to avert
my gaze away from him and try to calm myself down. It’s okay Jessica, he’s like
that with every girls. You know he’s like that.
We finally reach the pancake restaurant and I whistle
blissfully. Archie might be the one who wanted to eat here, but it’s a lie if I
say that I didn’t want to eat here too.
We sit down on a table for two near the window and order.
Right after we finish ordering, Archie stretches. “Man I’m hungry! I hope it
comes quickly.” He rubs his stomach afterwards and I could only laugh.
He then rests his arm on the table and uses it as a support
for his chin. “Thanks for coming here with me Jess. I wouldn’t want to come to
this place without you anyway,” he says with his eyes deep into mine.
I almost blurt out my lemon tea when he says that. But I
regain my composure and nod. I hope it was not too obvious that I was
embarrassed.
Take it easy Jessica. He’s just that type of guy.
We continue talking together, mostly about schools or our
friends. I realize how easy it is to talk to him, as if we have been friends
for forever.
The truth is, I’ve known him for barely three years. We’re now
almost at the end of our second year at high school, and I knew him from back
when we were a freshman. We happened to be in the same class back then, and we
became close friends right away.
Archie was a great friend. And still is until now.
But, if there’s something that I should note, then it’s the
fact that Archie… changes.
What makes Archie from back then different from Archie now is
the way he treats me. Actually, all of this attention and sweet talk that he
suddenly gives to me start from this summer break. At the end of our school
days, before the summer break, I remember him finding me alone in the
classroom. We talked for a while, and I remembered clearly what he said back
then.
“You know what? I would
love to spend this holiday with you since we’re both not going anywhere. What
do you think?”
At that time, I thought that it was all on friendly terms. I
then cheerfully said yes, and was actually ecstatic, since spending time with
Archie is one of the best things that I could be doing this holiday. Especially
when most of my girl friends were going overseas this holiday, leaving me
alone.
But, if spending time with Archie mean being on a turmoil
ride of watching his sweet smile combine with my stomach fluttering every few
seconds, then I would have pass. What is this
we are doing, again? Why would he do something that make my heart race
every few seconds?
And oh, I haven’t even mentioned the text messages. He used too many smiley faces. Not to mention a
hug emoticon every now and then. Or a constant good night messages. And also
good morning messages.
I smile weakly when he suddenly brings out the topic of his
ex-girlfriend. I wonder if this is how he treats all his girlfriends.
I inwardly shook my head rapidly at the thought. Why would I
be thinking about this? We are not even dating!
… Yet. Right?
I mean, honestly, he does seem to like me. Or am I reading
too much into this? Does he treat all the other girls this way as well? What is
it that he’s actually feeling?
I want to scream in frustration. Does he like me? If he
does, why don’t he just tell me about it rather than giving me this confusing
codes and gestures? Or does he think that he will get rejected if he tells me?
Wait, how do I feel about him anyway? I know I feel nervous
around him, but I think that’s only because of his surprising attitude. So, how
do I feel?
How do I feel about him?
0.0
Archie [11.57 PM]:
Good night, Jess.
I sigh at my phone’s screen. If that’s the only thing that’s
written there, well then all is good. But he has to add that little hug emoticon at the end of that
sentence. He just has to.
I pinch my temple and throw the phone away. Why? Why does he
do this?
It’s as if everything is going fine for me. Any of my normal
girl friends would scream and shout, “Jessica!!!! That guy likes you!!!!” Well
yohoooooo, a guy likes me.
But it’s never that easy, right?
I don’t know why, but I never could bring myself to believe
it that easily. Maybe it’s easy for people to say that there’s something going
on between the two of us. But I can’t bring myself to say that.
The biggest mystery is actually the time he does this. Why
would he do this now? Out of every time we have in the world-spending time
together in school, etcetera-he needs to choose now. Why now?
I lie on my bed and look up at the ceiling. Is it true that
there’s something going on between us?
I look up to the ceiling for a while, trying to find answer
to that question, and sigh. I can’t lie any longer. I’ve known the answer to
this question for a while.
Of course there’s something going on. He makes it seem as if
something is going on between us.
I keep on staring at the ceiling. All of the times we’ve
spent together suddenly flash in front of me. I sigh in defeat.
He makes it seem like something is going on between the two
of us.
And I have started to believe in that.
0.0
A new semester starts with me being a third year.
More boring lectures and speeches from the teachers paint my
school life. They are now pressing us more on the matter of discipline, and how
we should always give good example to our juniors now that we’re the oldest in
school.
I yawn and look around my new class to fill my boredom. My
gaze falls on Archie who is sitting a couple of row in the back, looking bored
as well. He suddenly turns his head and our gaze lock. He grins.
My heart exponentially beats faster when I see his smile. I
smile back to him, mentally wishing that my cheeks had not just turn really
red.
I look down at my textbook and pretend to be busy. It’s been
a while since school has started, but we haven’t talk. And I don’t know since
when, but we’ve stopped texting each other as well. I don’t know what’s this
supposed to mean.
It left me even more confused.
The clock ticks and it’s finally break time. I stand up from
my seat and stretch, finally relieve that I could eat. My friends approach me
and we go down to the cafeteria together. But no matter where I go, my gaze
seems to be falling on Archie all the time.
I try to be calm and smile back whenever I see him, but my
gesture seems to intrigue him. He finally approaches me. “Hey guys!” He greets
us all.
He is friend with almost all of my friends as well, so we
all greet him back and act like normal. I steal a couple of glances of him and
realize that he’s acting just like he usually does. Before the summer break.
The school then commences like usual, but I notice something
odd. Archie doesn’t even mention anything about what we did at summer break. He
talks to everyone like usual, and treats me like usual as well.
No more smile that could turn my inside upside down, or
sweet words and talks that he used to say all the time. No more longing look
that he always give to me whenever we met. No more text messages or hugs
emoticons.
He still calls me his best friend, but that’s basically it.
It’s like we’re just normal best friends.
It’s like there’s nothing between us to begin with.
But, there was something. Right?
0.0
My days continue with no more thoughts of Archie or the
summer.
Whenever I look at Archie, there will always be this ache in
my heart, a place where I will always wonder what was it that he wanted back
then. Was he just a heartbreaker? Was he one of those guys who have the hobby
of throwing empty promises and hopes? I would like to believe that he’s not.
But it’s getting harder and harder to do so each day.
There will also be a part of me who would roll its eyes and
laugh at me. Maybe back then I was just being a little bit too expecting. Maybe
he never meant anything else after all. Maybe that ‘something’ between us is
never a thing at all.
Somehow, being a third year, days pass quicker than I would
ever imagine. Suddenly it’s assessment time, final project time, exam time.
Graduation time.
Now, it’s the final week of school. I sit down in my desk
quietly, trying to absorb everything that has been going on in my life ever
since I’m a third year. A lot of new memories, new friends, new struggles. New
expectations that went down the drain.
I turn my head to spot Archie sleeping peacefully in his
desk. I couldn’t help but smile at his sleeping face. He looks really calm and
peaceful.
Something inside of me stirs every time I see him. Is it
regret? Guilt? Shame?
It’s almost the end of our high school time, and all that I
want is a clearance. But how could I get it? I couldn’t just nonchalantly
approach him and say, “Oh hey remember last summer? Yeah so I thought back then
you like me, is that true? Just for making sure you know, I don’t like loose
ends.”
I sigh and bury my head on the desk. Why am I feeling this
way anyway? Why do I want clearance so much? Why am I begging for explanation?
Then it hits me.
I like him.
No, I liked him.
Back then, when he was nice and all. Am I still now? I don’t know. Maybe what
I’m feeling right now is just remnants of regrets and the residual of feelings
I used to have for him.
I used to like him very much. Why does it take me this long
to realize it?
Now, there’s nothing else that I could do. Unless I muster
up the courage to approach him and ask directly, then nothing will ever happen.
And I’m not sure if I’ll be brave enough to face him.
Which left me with the option of living with regrets.
Hooray.
0.0
It’s graduation day.
Everyone is crying. I cry too, obviously.
I keep on hugging every one of my friends, bidding farewell,
and wishing good luck to whatever they’re doing next. Until, before I even know
it, Archie is standing in front of me.
I’m surprised to see him. “Archie! You cry?”
He laughs. “A little, I won’t lie about that. But our Jessica
here also cries a lot it seems.”
“I have a soft heart,” I pout.
He laughs. Then he gives me that look. That look. The one he gave me all summer.
My eyes light up when I see that. It’s been such a long time
since I last saw that. I actually miss that gaze.
I don’t know what to do. He then let out a crook smile. “I
will miss you, Jessica. I will,” he says. And I know he meant it. I know he meant
it.
I smile back at him, but I’m somehow unable to reply to what
he just said. Instead I just say, “Good luck with your uni life, Archie. Don’t
play around too much, okay?”
He chuckles. He has a nice laugh. Have I ever mention the
fact that he has a nice laugh?
“You too Jess,” he says before a couple of our friends
approach us. We ended up taking a lot of pictures together with our friends,
despite our smudge makeup and horrible crying faces.
Later on, as I wait for my parents to pick me up with the
car, I see Archie standing there with his parents. He’s talking and smiling
happily, and I can’t help but feel sense of regret punching my stomach. I’m
going to miss him so much.
And with that, I walk into the car and go home. As I watch
him silently from the car, I can’t think of anything else but how our summer
adventure was only a story with no ending.
Because in the end, I’ve decided that there’s nothing more
in it.
Our story was just a summer fling after all.
0.0
Muahahahaha.
Uda lama banget kan ya gw ga pernah taro cerita yg gw tulis lagi disini? Nah maka itu gw taro cerita ini, satu cerita yang cukup personal buat gw. Kenapa Kari???? Bukan, bukan gara2 gw pernah di PHP-in cowo, tapi cerita ini tu inspired dari dua orang temen baik gw. Kira-kira kejadian mereka digabung jadi satu mirip begini laa.
Dan gw bisa dengan pede juga bilang bahwa cerita ini cukup relatable buat ciwikz-ciwikz di luar sana. Mungkin buat orang yang ga pernah di kondisi kayak si Jessica ga bakal ngerti ato bisa connect dengan baik sama ceritanya, karena mereka kurang ngerti sbenernya si Archie tu orangnya kayak gimana. Tapi gpp, karena cerita ini emang sengaja dibuat supaya orang-orang yg pernah mengalami hal yang sama (terutama cewe2) inget lagi perasaan mereka sama 'Archie' mereka itu. Siapapun itu yg PHP-in mereka
Emm Kari jadi singkat cerita maksud lo adalah supaya orang2 galau gitu baca cerita lu???
Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
*cepat2 kabur*
Muahahaha ga laaa. Plot cerita ini emang uda ada di otak gw sejak lama, jadi gw pengen banget nulis soal ini. Gw juga pengen sekalian kasih unjuk salah satu temen gw itu. Tapi toh biar gampang, gw taro aja di blog biar orang sekalian baca apa salahnya.
Oke de cukup sampe disini. Maap ya kalo kalian jadi galau gara2 gw (hihihi I'm not sorry).
God bless people! :D
